But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize