eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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