that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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