so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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