Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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