Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
