The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
