So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Your topless pictures make me question reality
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
