Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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