i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
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