After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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