hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
