where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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