I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
