i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
