I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Randomize
