how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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