Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
