dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
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