Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
