It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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