me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
