yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
