you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
