I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
