Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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