I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
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