Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
