yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
