so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
