Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
