normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
