Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
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