I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
