I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Randomize
