i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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