i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
