Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
