how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
