You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Randomize
