I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
