Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
