Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
