The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
