You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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