i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
