My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
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