just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
My breasts were aching with rage.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
