he wants to bone in the snuggie
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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