Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
